I went snowboarding last week for the third time ever. I decided to force myself to go on the harder runs even though they scare me. I live by a new snowboarding motto: “This is not the bunny hill I want to die on.”
When we first arrived at the ski resort, Roch went to buy our lift tickets while I went to the rental shop to get my snowboard. As I was filling out the disclaimer form (disclaimer??? No – I’m not going to die today), Roch came in and told the attendant that he will pay for my rental while I fill out the form.
“Sure, no problem, how old is she?”
Oh my God. I haven’t had to tell anyone my age since I turned *ahem* thirty. And as I was milling over my possible answers, I realized that I would not be able to answer because the attendant asked Roch. Roch hesitated and then said “thirty.”
The attendant seemed confused, maybe he thought I was a youth or something. But I’ve spoken with Roch and we’ve decided that “twenty-ish” sounds best, so that will be our answer from now on. Adult would work fine too.
I gathered up my gear and headed out for a great day of adult snowboarding. Unfortunately, I ran into one of my nephew’s 12-year old buddies. He made some jokes as usual and then I came back with a blow that would rival any junior highschooler’s wisecrack… “Your mamma.”
We all laughed and spirits were high until he said “Wow… I’ve never heard a grown-up say that before.” Hold on. What do you mean grown-up? Oh jeeze! I’m a grown-up? No I’m not. And I wanted to throw a full foot-stomping tantrum and yell “I know you are, but what am I!” just to prove my point.
I’m half-way to sixty. Ouch.
Hey, I don't want this picture. What gives?
4 Comments
I f-ing love you, you old hag! I went snowboarding the other day too…for the first time ever…on Mt. Hood!! I was a bit scared too sitting above the clouds, seeing mountain ranges all the way to WA. It took me over an hour to get down the mountain and I’m just starting to get my range of motion back
But damn, so worth the pain. It was gorgeous up there! And when I did do okay, it was lots of fun. I need to get better. Maybe I’ll call you tomorrow.
Yes, you should call me. I want the details of your little adventure anyway.
Jenn, That was the most amusing story I’ve ever heard. (almost anyway).
Seriously though, you should send it to reader’s digest. Very funny!! Since I am so much closer to sixty than you, I can really relate to the story.
Love you and miss you,
MOM
Thanks Mom, I’ve been working on my writing skills.